CALGARY -- Just in time for Valentine's day, a Calgary woman has written a book about going on a year-long dating spree to learn the relationship she had with herself was the most important.
"But also I think when you're confident you are also more attractive," said Cindy Drummond, author of Reflections from the Dating Pool.
After a bad break-up, she set a goal over a defined period of time to find a partner; and for 52 weeks after that, squeezed in dates at coffee shops, wine bars, restaurants and a few golf courses.
The bulk of her dates were sourced from online dating sites and apps as well as being set up by friends.
A funny thing happened on Drummond's road to meeting Mr. Right: she realized she was learning valuable lessons about herself, and gaining self-confidence in the process.
"I was developing words of wisdom that I was sharing with myself as I went through the journey," said Drummond.
Somewhere in between the next wine bar and coffee date, Drummond had another epiphany.
"(I realized) I will be OK if I don't find the right person for me," she said.
And understanding that was almost as exciting as meeting someone special.
Urged on by friends, who thought she had some valuable insights, and great stories to share, Drummond put pen to paper.
She says the book's message isn't just for singles looking for love, either.
"It's a story about a real person who was in a real space," she said, "and just decided she wanted to pick herself up, dusted herself off and learn how to thrive."
As well, local resarchers say Valentine's Day can place too much emphasis on being in a couple, overlooking the needs of those who are unattached.
"I think on a day like to today its important to remember that this is a time we remember those whom we love but also a time when many people do feel very lonely," said Melanie Rock, associate professor in Community Health Sciences at the University of Calgary, and the O'Brien Institute for Public Health.
As for Drummond, she contined to date after the year was up -- and met somebody she thought was pretty special.
"I said you're number 53," she said, "and he said 'or I could be the last'."
And he was. Drummond is still married to him.
The book is available on Amazon (https://www.amazon.ca/Reflections-Dating-Pool-Cindy-Drummond-ebook/dp/B07YNZBX7B) and Owl's Nest in Britannia. (http://www.owlsnestbooks.com/)
